Hurricane Cole’Slaw: Should we rebuild the Watergate?
A person has asked me to update the site with a new post, however, I ensure you that this is not pandering to that particular reader. I’ll write whenever I damn well please. Just be glad to get anything. Why do you need me anyways? Write your own drivel you 9-5 IBM pissant.
So, I guess that it’s only natural that I talk about the looming elections that will soon overtake some of our lives, only to return us unchanged and unresolved. I am of course talking about the upcoming SBA student elections for first-year law students. Our most promising candidate has based his entire platform on acquiring new Posturepedic chairs for the library. No sense in bettering the world or other charitable acts, there’s a guy over here with restless leg syndrome. This kid already has written a mock newspaper article with inside jokes from the initial two weeks of law school. As for me, I’d rather elect the Prince of Nigeria or that rapist Nixon. (Checkers still sore after all these years)
Politics and the law seem to be inextricably linked and with all of this election crap being slung, I ask myself one question: if I pretend to care enough about something, can I trick myself into actually caring about it? My answer has always been a resounding no. I think that I have sort of a weak stomach for that sort of business. Politics is not for people with Crohn’s. So, go ahead and delude yourselves anyway, just don’t ask me to write your fucking speeches, or your jokes for that matter.
As for actual work, it really isn’t that bad yet. Most of the work consists of reading and then writing case briefs, which are widely available on the Internet. They tell us to write our own briefs, but I liken it to flossing in that it’s probably better if you do it, but no one does it. I suppose that I could be putting in more of an effort, but December exams are far away. Besides, Seinfeld’s only on three times a day, I still have 22 and a half hours left to study.
I’m still thinking that this whole law dealie is having some drastic affects on my personal life. I’m currently seeing a girl who lives in The Watergate and I feel like a CREEP. I may not win an election but, hey, at least I’m fucking spongeworthy.
Mr. Cole, what you’ve just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul.